Benaiah: Eight Month Update + A Little Bit about My Journey with Postpartum Anxiety
And just like that, my boy is eight months old. These months are flying by way too quickly and I daily stand back amazed, as I watch our little boy grow into more of a boy and less of a baby. Time, slow down!
This past month has been full of new things, complete with finger foods, crawling, and even a few words!
Meanwhile, I am over here trying to figure out where my baby has gone. How do they grow up so quickly?
Benaiah is doing much better with sleeping! Thanks to a few hard nights of sleep training, Benaiah will now go down around 7:30 and only cry a few minutes before falling asleep. Typically, he will get up around 11pm to eat and wake up around 6:30. The past week, he’s been up quite a bit more, but I think that is he teething. Poor buddy!
I am so thankful to be getting extra rest and even having a few hours in the evening to get work done or spend time with Landon. As much as I miss those night time snuggles, having a few hours to myself and with Landon is refreshing and definitely needed!
Although we’ve conquered bed time, nap time is a different story. His naps seem sporadic, but as I’ve been trying to observe his nap schedule the past week, I’ve noticed he will generally get sleepy around 9-10 am around 12 and then again around 2 or 3. He doesn’t always nap each of those hours, but he will cat nap and sleep for at least 30 minutes.
We are working on getting him into a better routine schedule, but for now, that is what it is.
Social and New Skills
Once again, this month has been a huge month of growth for our little boy (I guess each month will be like that, right?) Benaiah is now officially crawling and boy, is he busy! I have to be vigilant about what is left on the ground, because anything that is on the ground he sees as fair game for him.
He’s also mastered standing up with the help of either mom, dad, or the furniture and loves to show off his standing skills to others. We definitely have a busy, curious boy and I have no doubt the fun won’t stop from here on out!
Benaiah loves chatting (sometimes loudly) at home with mom and dad, but I’ve noticed when we are out and about he is quiet, observing everything around him. (I think he gets this from Landon!) He can say ‘da da’ (his favorite!) and ‘ma ma.’
He loves going to the park, playing with his daddy, mommy, aunts, uncles, grandmas and grandpas, reading, bath time, crawling around the house, standing while leaning on the couches, playing with his toys, and mommy singing. He isn’t a huge fan of grass, diaper changes, or getting dressed.
Benaiah loves to eat and with each passing week, seems to like solid food more and more. He LOVES bananas and I don’t think I’ve ever seen him so excited about anything else before. He’s also tried spinach, carrots, sweet potatoes, apples, broccoli, pears, mangoes, and appears to like each one of those too. So far, he really enjoys bananas, sweet potatoes and broccoli (just like his mama!) and tolerates carrots and spinach.
I am still nursing him throughout the day, on demand, but it probably averages out to be five to six times a day. As much as I love seeing him enjoy solid food, I know part of me will miss those special nursing sessions. As the months unfold and Benaiah grows, I cherish each moment more and more as I see him becoming much more of a little boy and more independent with each passing day.
How am I Doing?
I don’t know what it is about having babies, but it changes you. I feel stronger than I have in a long time and much more aware of my own deep dependence on Christ. It took a while for me to feel ‘myself,’ after having Benaiah and I struggled through some postpartum anxiety after bringing Niah into the world. Honestly, it wasn’t what I expected and I wasn’t prepared for dealing with anxiety while caring for a newborn. But yet again, God proved himself strong and I can honestly say now, I believe the worst is behind me.
Most days, now, are wonderful and I feel like my old self. (Hallelujah!) Some days, I’ve learned there can be hard days/moments and it’s OKAY. Bad days happen to us all and it’s in those moments that Jesus teaches me that my strength comes from Him alone and not from myself. As I learn to rely on Christ, God has shown me time and time again how that hard season of postpartum anxiety was actually beautiful. It was beautiful because I saw just how much Jesus cared for me by surrounding me with people who loved me through it and supported me. I’ve learned to get enough sleep, make sure I’m hanging out with other adults during the day and simply be still and savor the moments with my son, while focusing my mind on Christ.
I’ve also learned that postpartum depression/anxiety happens to so many more new moms than I would have imagined! If you are a new, struggling mom, don’t feel alone. Find someone you trust and open up to them. There is freedom in sharing our journeys, struggles, trials and fears with others and walking through the good and the bad with those we love. Life isn’t always a walk in the park- sometimes it’s tears and trials. But without the trials, we wouldn’t know just how good the good times are. And that’s kind of beautiful isn’t it?
Questions of the Day
- For all you moms out there- what was the hardest part about having a baby?
- What is your current favorite food?
- Has anyone else struggled with anxiety before?